We Need To Talk About Your Deliverables
“OK, do we have everyone? Caitlin, are you there? Good. Nate, did you loop in Jake? Great. Kayla, please mute your mic. Wonderful.
So, thanks for reaching out about this as a group. Sorry it’s taken me this long to circle back with you guys.
I’ll get right to it, since I have a hard stop at 2. The problem is centered around your deliverables. If we want to be seen as the thought leaders in our industry, we’ve got to lean in. We all know the table stakes here. You guys make a great team, you’re task-oriented and solution-focused, I’m just not seeing the impactfulness right now that I’ve come to expect.
We need to do a deep dive. We’ve got to unpack our core competencies and get really granular. To scale this thing, I’m going to need you guys to leverage your expertise and really take it to the next level.
Sure, Nate, you might not see the value-add right now, but I’m working on something to incentivize you.
No, Caitlin, we’re not using consultants. We can action it independently. We’ll ideate amongst ourselves and bootstrap this thing.
Look, I know you guys don’t have the bandwidth right now, but I’m not looking to reinvent the wheel. I just want something actionable, something we can plug and play, an out-of-the-box solution.
To put it plainly, we’ve got to move the needle. But right now we don’t have the juicebox. Can we nightlight it?
Believe me, I’m going to bat for you on this. I need you all to be abstract while I negotiate for the collapsing flamingo medley.
I know that once you guys trim the wolfsbane, we’ll be back in a head gasket before anyone else can even mail some pugs.
I’ve got your back, guys. I’m manifesting derwentwater stones for all of you, and I’m bringing shining cities of translucent hi-tops.
Great, sounds like a plan. Caitlin, you’ll microwave the fistbump, Nate can pickle the back roads, Jake will trestle the nomenclature and Kayla will interpret the leftover theocracy.
I’m so glad we under-armed the nocturnal brass seizures in time to hold up the seagulls for wax.
Half an exploding Jello pressure zone defense sitting under the boardwalk it off, shake that rainfall of civilized society time enough for love in the age of disparate hand-offs.
After seventeen astronauts wane, trembling squirrel gummies will spiral northward.
Ok then. Froot Loops.”